Review: Beowulf

This movie made me want to run around and scream "I AM BEOWULF" and then poke people in the eye. The best part of the movie is definitely the 3-D. If you cant go see this movie in 3-D then don't go see it.

My favorite scenes are the ones in which Beowulf is screaming at the top of his lungs and shanking things. It was just done in a hilarious over the top manor. When he fights Grendel naked the scene plays out like its out of an Austin Powers movie, except instead of Elizabeth Hurley there is a disfigured giant glob of poo man (Grendel). I feel that much of this movie was inspired by 300. But Beowulf is no King Leonidas.

The animation in the movie was fantastic. They did a really good job on beards. I think they may have had a meeting that went something like this
"hey we are good at beards"
"you're right, I think we need more of them"
"yes, beards all around. Everyone in beards"
"what about the women"
"well we can make up for the women by giving old men hairy noses"
"HOORAY!"
------ end scene----


Many people are talking about Angelina Jolie's naked scene like it was something special. Honestly she was the worst animated character in the film. She looked plastic and more like a barbie doll than a sexy serpent. I still got half a chub tho. I really wish they spent half the time they spent on animating Grendel on Jolie.

Go see this in theaters in 3-D. I expect the DVD to sell poorly.

3 giant mugs of the finest mead out of 5